Wednesday, August 19, 2009

In Honor of My Mom

My mom has suffered with chronic back pain for 3+ years. She has been to doctor after doctor who have told her there wasn't hope of the pain ending and could not give her any reasons for the pain. For those who know her this may come as a surprise. The reason this is probably news to you is because she suffers in silence.

Standing, walking, sitting, laying, picking up things, setting down things, things we take for granted have been obstacles for her. But you wouldn't know this. She doesn't complain, she doesn't sigh, she doesn't cry or get angry. She pours love into her kids and her grandkids and husband. She prays with hope that God still hears her prayers while she still suffers and she never once blames Him. She says things like "there is people who have it worse than me" or "this has made me more compassionate to those who have chronic illness and pain".

I think about how my reaction would be. I'm ashamed that it would be the selfish option of wallowing in pity and anger. There has been times when I said to God "you could take this from her" and "why her, God?". Bitter tears and a heavy heart.

As her daughter I have had the great privilege of watching her persevere. I have been lucky enough to pray for her and claim for her God's promises, that His greater good is at work and that He is in control and loves her still. He has shown us His mighty sovereignty by giving her times of no pain and relief from the medications that she has had to take daily just to survive. We never lost hope. We never claimed that there was no hope and we never accepted condemnation to a life of pain for her.

This week she had a surgery that has replaced two of her "leaky" discs and we are praying with the hope that this is the answer. She is in the hospital right now recovering and I am relived that her mind is free from that worry for the moment.

I wanted to relay to you what a strong, powerfully sweet and kind woman my mom is, but I just can't do it justice. Those who know her know this to be true and those who are close to her know her loyalty and passion for life. There are times when parenting is rough for me, where my patience is gone and life just seems really hard. Then I remember how my mom has been good to us and selfless and kind and it brings me back and past my selfish desires. I think to myself "Will I ever be like her?" I can only hope and pray that I touch upon the greatness that is my mom.

Please keep praying for her recovery. Believe with me in God's healing in her life. She deserves to live as the princess to the King that she is. We love you mom "Nana". You are truly the best!

This is the verse we claimed for her as she is entering into a new stage in her life:
Isaiah 41:10 (New International Version)
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

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